Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Oh dear god

Let's just take a moment to appreciate this.
are we done? ok good. If you're also feeling a lot of
Feminist-anger  right now I know exactly how you feel-
you just need to calm yourself with some Betty Friedan
Virgina Woolfe and Beyonce. 
 We can get through this together.
This is literally from Maxim Magazine.
No wonder people give us feminists so much hate.
I'm sorry I just can verbalize my anger right now
I literally jut feeling making a long string of angry
grunts and other noises because there are no words that I
can use to properly capture my utter disgust.
goodnight and goodbye- 
I am receding into my feminist lair for a night of angry muttering
and feminist plotting against the world and stuff.

Ooh la la

Please take a gander at this fine video by Paul O'Flanagan about "fitting in" and individuality and all that presented in the form of a 1950s cartoon. Can it get any better? Nope.
Beauty Now
And while you're there, browse through the Girls' POV section, there are some totally rad videos which I'm sure you'll enjoy. "Evolution" "Fourteen" and "naked: breasts" I recommend highly.

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice

Hello Hello and prepare to venture once again, back to the mysterious and dangerous place also known as my mind. Firstly, do ignore the sexist nature of my title, which I took from our well known, sexist song. How do you know I'm made of sugar and spice and everything nice? Oh that's right, you don't. Anyways, I chose it because I'm in a Little Rascals kind of mood, and though I won't be ranting about the Little Rascals, I have found some excellent gifs which I will be using from that glorious movie. 
Today, on this particularly regular tuesday, I will be ranting to you about boys.
Sorry, sorry. I couldn't help myself. Moving swiftly onwards. I am, as you probably know by now, in highschool.And as a highschool girl, of course I hear a lot about boys. Highschool is where girls start coming into themselves. We've gone through puberty so *magically* we don't have the bodies of nine-year-old boys anymore. Breast. Butts. Booty, hips, curves. And we like to feel pretty and confident, and for many girls (too many, if you ask me) the main way to feel confident and attractive is to have attention from the male species. It's no secret. Everyone likes compliments. But compliments from boys are special. well, unless the girl isn't straight- that's a different story. So let me put it this way- getting attention and compliments from whatever sex you're attracted to is  a very boosting, and desired thing for us highschool ladies. And for college ladies. and working ladies. there is nothing wrong with liking to be noticed, and being called pretty. sure, it's nice when a guy or girl or whatev finds you attractive. YES I know I kinda perpetuate the whole "I don't need your opinion" thing- which I believe in. But you get what I'm saying. Even though you don't need their affirmation to know how lovely you are, it's nice to hear.
Ok now I can rant. What I don't like- what I despise is when girls/women/female things degrade themselves for attention. Why do you think there is the whole "Ditz" character? For some reason, many men find the clueless, dumb girl who can't do anything but wear cleavage-y dresses really "hot". But we'll get into that in another post. This is for the girls/women/female things. Remember how we talked about... OK how I talked about how changing yourself for other people is the lamest most lame thing that anyone could ever do and you should never do it because it's lame?
Yes, I have a gif for everything. Get over it honey, I know I'm fabulous.
Well this falls under the whole don't-change-yourself-for-others-because-it's.... ok you get the point. I personally do not go to a school where this is a problem (thank god) but it really is at other schools. Girls feel like they have to be dumb and vulnerable for guys to notice them. The damsel in distress scenario is kinda hard to pull of in highschool because of the whole lack of castles and 200 lb. armor thing. So girls instead make themselves seem like they need help from some dude so that he'll be able to fill the desired manly-man, knight-in-LAME-armor archetype and swoop into rescue her from the evil math problem that she just can't solve on her own. Must I make a Mean Girls Reference?? I think not. 
Don't pretend you don't know things. UGH. Being smart is sexy. Knowing stuff is hot. If you degrade yourself, all you're doing is boosting the dude's ego, and it may seem like you're benefiting...but do you really want people thinking you're a "ditz". No honey.
Also, this whole thing about guys not liking girls who are smarter than them is such crap. 
Dudes- if you feel threatened by girls to the point that you only find those who are less intelligent than you attractive then you need to GROW UP. Women aren't just sacks of potatoes who just roll around and can't solve math problems or conjugate verbs in french class, waiting for you to swing them over your shoulder and carry them into the sunset. And if you don't feel threatened and you just "don't like them" then I don't know what's wrong with you, but obviously something is. Sorry, was that too harsh? Sorry for not being sorry :)
And for the lovely ladies. Be proud of you're smarts, and be proud of your everything. If you don't know how to do the math problem, fine. If the conjugation of "aimer" in french just doesn't click, cool. But be proud of yourself girl. JEEZ there I go being all  mushy and inspirational. I try not to, I swear. But I just want all you lovely girl/woman/female things to stop trying to make themselves dumber, ditzier, vulnerable..er? More vulnerable, more helpless. Be strong, and remember

Ok? Ok. And if you encounter someone who can't handle you in all your glory, then here are some steps to walk you through the process:
1. Smile 
2. flip you hair, or some equally sassy action (snapping gum, placing hand on hip rolling of eyes or all in combination are recommended) 
3. turn around
4. begin walking away
5.finish off with a 

And I think that'll do it. 
So yeah kids, that's all for tonight. Next post will be about the male side of this, and then another will be about my love for Jessica Rabbit and other Femme Fatale Characters... so *whoop whoop* look foreword to that I suppose. Don't forget to submit or write to me if you got anything to say (email in the sidebar, duh).

Be well, be swell. Ummm... don't lower youself.... Smart is sexy... I don't really need to recap the whole post.... my gifs are amazing.... Watch the Little Rascals...
Kisses and many feminist vibes

Saturday, January 25, 2014

Throwin' Some Tunes Your Way

A playlist to listen to when you feel the need for Feminist inspiration
and exhilaration. 

Friday, January 24, 2014

Braided Hair, Mocha Skin

Hello Hello all you beautiful creatures. It's been a while, I know. But I'm back in all my feminist glory to rant about something a little different tonight. Myself.
Hi, I'm Panteha Abareshi and I am, without a doubt, a woman of color. God, that sounded cheesy. But anyways- I am half Jamaican and half Iranian and Canadian (because I was born there...). The point is I'm all over the place. 
I spent the 8 vital years of childhood development (age 5-12) at one school, with a group of people that remain generally constant. I was the only black girl for a very long time, and all of my friends were white. I grew to envy them slowly, and racked my brain but couldn't grasp why I couldn't look like them. You see, I have this thing called an afro rooted to my head. I've had it all my life, and I don't think it's going anywhere. But all my friends had naturally straight, glossy hair and I Just Didn't Get It. I wanted so badly to have light, long hair that I could toss effortlessly over my shoulder as I laughed, or get cut into bangs. But I had, and still have thick, dark hair that grows out, not down. So I wore my hair in pigtails that my father would comb my hair into for me. Yep. 3-4 braids adorned at the ends with colorful beads, and held in place with equally colorful hair ties. And then I was introduced to perms. Hurrah! Now I could finally get the straight hair I had lusted after for so long. All I had to do was fill my hair with chemicals that made my scalp burn and made my ends coarser than steel wool. But I was overjoyed to finally be able to wear my hair down, and I felt like I fit in more. 
I'll spare you all the agony, and We'll fast foreword through the awkward year that elapsed between then and now. So, voila. Here I am. I'm still Panteha Abareshi. Duh. But I've realized something my younger self could've really used. I know now that I shouldn't change myself just for the purpose of fitting in with others. UGH THIS SOUNDS SO "SELF-HELP"-Y AND LAME. But I don't really know how else to say it, so go along with it kids. I don't have to. You don't have to. Nobody has to. If every kid changed themselves to act and look and talk and walk and smell and eat and think like one person- one "popular" "pretty" "perfect" person- then what we'd be left with would be a big, stinkin' pile of clones. 

I should have never hated my 'fro. Or wanted green eyes instead of my brown ones. I don't have to be fair skinned to be beautiful. I don't have to be a size 00 to be attractive. I sport my box braids proudly, and I honestly don't give a damn about what people think I should do to myself for this and that reason. I wear what I want (which is mostly just tie dye and jeans), act how I want and if people can't accept that then that's not really my problem anymore.
So to the "weird kid" who's hair is a beautifully kinky mess. To the "awkward" tall girl who towers above her classmates. To the "nerd". To the "losers". The "weirdos". "Freaks". "Geeks". To everyone who is deemed abnormal by someone who fits the random bill of perfection society has created: please, please don't make yourself change to please other people and fit in. 
God I hate that ridiculous saying. Fit In. The phrase suggests that life is like that stupid game babies have where they have to fit the shaped blocks into the specific holes. The circles into the circle hole. the Squares into the square hole. So where do the hexagons go? The nonagons? And what about the dodecahedrons? Ok, it may seem like I'm just showing off my extensive knowledge of geometric figures, but I swear I'm not. The point is this. Don't make yourself a square just to fit into the stupid, pre-cut hole. Ok. forget this metaphor. Listen up kids. It's really not worth it. I learned the hard way that changing for the people around you rather than for yourself doesn't do anything but make you miserable. In grade school  highschool, college, life (or whatever comes after school), it may seem lame and hard to find people you can relate with, but changing yourself to fit in with the readily available people will just suck even more. so... yeah. avoid that. If you just be yourself, then I'm sure you'll find people who you can accept for themselves and who accept you. In fact, I guarantee it- just like in the Men's Warehouse ads. 
So lets just all be weirdos together, and have weirdo relationships with other weirdos. Let's all be awkward, and strange, and funky and crazy together. And Let's just enjoy it. 

Goodnight from one PROUD weirdo to another

Monday, January 20, 2014

Yay, Flaming Homosexuals

Hello Hello, all you human things.
Tonight, from the very pits of my Feminist Lair, I will be ranting about Flaming Homosexuals (yay yippee Hooray). 
I am so glad to be living in this day and age, where being gay is more and more and more accepted. Finally when people say that there is equality in the U.S., there will actually be equality. I am also glad that I am mostly surrounded by extremely accepting people. People my age around me feel very safe, and aren't afraid of expressing their sexual orientation. Bi. Pansexual. Demisexual. Gay. Straight. Lesbian. Asexual. Queer. Trans as well, but that is a gender identification (duh). And btw "Queer" is not an insult. It's actually an identifying word that is used by non-straightys. Anyways. I'm extremely lucky to be in this gay-ok atmosphere. This is not to say that there still isn't discrimination and bullying of people/youths in the LGBTQ* community. I know that it's still, infuriatingly and unfortunately, a huge problem that the LQBTQ* community deals with. So I'm here to talk about stereotypes  which is something I'm quite good at so yay.
There is this weird attitude towards the gay population. It's like people pick and choose from the different types of sexual orientations which ones they want to support. 
"well yeah I support gays, but being Bi is just stupid! Why don't they pick one or the other!" or
"I don't think two dudes is right, but yeah, I love lesbians". Ummmmmmmm excuse me. No, Honey. It doesn't work like that. You can't just pick and choose what you like and don't like. This isn't an Icecream shop where you can get the flavors you like and ignore the one's you don't. It's a cone with every flavor or no ice cream at all (BAM. ice cream analogies always get people attention). Men tend to "love" the lesbians, and women tend to "love" the gay guys. There is this fascination held among the male population with lesbians (I'm sure you've all noticed). It's the porn industry, and the fact that, well, two women  means double all the good bits and peices women have already. It's fine for two women to being seen in public kissing. it's "hot". Seriously, it's sickeningly misogynic that men "support" lesbians because of  purely sexual reasons. But two men? suddenly it's inappropriate. And with women- highschool girls all want to be hags, and have a gay shopping buddy that they can gossip with and watch Sex in the City with. Can people just stop expecting gay guys to be these fabulous little fashion gurus, who make bold fashion choices, and are miraculously all makeup professionals? I unfortunately cannot speak from the perspective of a gay guy, but I'm sure that some of the gay dudes aren't like the ones depicted in the ABC family TV shows, with frosted blonde tips and immaculate cuticles.  Or, you know, Bruno. 

I can feel the fabulous through the screen, can't you? 
There's this confusion in our society regarding the fact that LGBTQ* people are no different in variety of actions and personalities than "regular", Straight people. 
Now regarding Lesbians. Why, oh why, is there such a negative image associated with lesbians? This image of the manly, short-haired woman who wears teeshirts and hates dresses is what society has depicted the lady-lovers as. Why is it that as soon as a woman is not all "feminine", dressed in bright summer dresses and picking flowers and wearing cute eyeshadow and being pleasing to men she is automatically gay? And why is it that only women who don't fit the "feminine" standard are used as the typical lesbian image? Sure, there are more "butch" lesbians, but there are also effeminate ones too. It feels so stupid writing this, because I feel like I'm just stating the obvious, but evidently not, because people still hold these stereotypical images of what they think gay or lesbian or bi or anything-besides-straight people look like. UGHH just stop it people.

I can't be the only one who's frustration emotions on this matter are perfectly depicted by the gif I so kindly provided.

And um, why does it even matter. Why does society have to characterize the LGBTQ* community as looking significantly different from "normal" people? Probably so that it's easier to label people. If someone looks like that instead of this, then they must be gay. Or lesbian. or whatever! Society had created these... what's the word I'm looking for? False... Hyperbolized... Generalized... insulting... images of what queer people act and look like so that it's easier for people to make judgements and assumptions. 
But why do people care so much. Why does who a guy loves or a girl sleeps with really matter to you? It's not like people being gay is going to somehow negatively effect the earth. Population isn't going to decline because suddenly everyone's gay and babies aren't being made (gay couples can actually have kids. Shocker, I know). Ok, so your religion says that it was Adam and Eve and not Adam and Steve or whatever. Ok. Cool. So... how about instead of coming and making other people's sexual preferences your personal business, you leave it alone and live your life, free of rainbows, and butterflies, and unicorns, and all those things that come with gay people. The people that are so madly against gay marriages, and picket and protest and throw tantrums are the very same people that wouldn't even notice if gay marriage was legal! Do you really think that if gay marriage was legal, the homophobic couple would be affected? Would their lives become bleak and unbearable because two people who love each other are getting married like every other hetero couple? Yeah, I don't think so. If you don't support gay marriage, then please, stop picketing, go home and live your life. Who are you to stop two people from loving each other?  From stopping them from being able to adopt a child that they will love and raise and nurture with the love of any other family. From stopping them from being able to save their loved one's life because the insurance companies don't except same-sex-couple as a relationship for paying someone's hospital bill.  Literally, please stop. I'm asking so nicely. picketing won't help. Yelling won't help. Hating won't help. Nation-wide equality for the LGBTQ* population is inevitable, so You're just going to piss off me and other, innocent people. And trust me, You don't want to piss off an angsty, teenage, feminist blogger.
So what I hope you got from this post, which was all over the place, was that you don't have to talk with your hands to be gay, or have your wallet on a chain and wear basketball shorts to be a lesbian. Sexual preferences aren't ice cream flavors. Picketing is pointless. Gay people won't lead to a sudden population decline.  
Can we all just be Gay-Ok? Thanks, kids.

And as much as I'd absolutely love to stay and keep writing, I kinda have something called "school" which I must legally attend. Like jury duty, but not really. Except for the part about legal obligation. So I'm gonna catch some shut-eye, because being a blogger kinda tends to drain all the energy and sleep out of you. I hope all you lovely things had a good MLK day and

No dissin' Same-sex Kissin', Ok?
Ok. Goodnight, and goodbye as I receed back into my feminist lair.

Sunday, January 19, 2014

52 Reasons Why I Am A Feminist

Hello Hello all you strange things

Tonight I've finished my little creation- a deck book of why I am a feminist. 
A deck book is basically a deck of cards turned into... wait for it... a book. So I took a 1.50$ deck of cards from Walgreens, wrote every reason I could think of for being a feminist (or at least 52 of them), punched some holes and voila. 

 Using just some sharpies and rings hanging around the house, a little bundle of feminism can be made by even you, mysterious stranger. Here are some of the inside. I mixed two decks, one red one black, to get the colors and cards I wanted. 

So there you have it kiddos, this is what I do with my free time. Enjoy. Be inspired. Feel the feminism coursing through your veins!! Well, okay. Maybe not coursing through your veins... but you get the idea. 
Anyways, I'll probably do more crafty stuff like this and share with you guys, forbidding that I don't get sucked into the unescapable pit that is NETFLIX. 

Goodnight from my feminist lair,

Saturday, January 18, 2014

I say What I Wanna Say

Hello Hello all you lovely things

Today I am here to write to you all about the wonderful art of talking. I, myself, quite enjoy talking. I like vocalizing my thoughts, and I will tell someone what I'm thinking or feeling without hesitation. But just because I happen to conform to the stereotype that says all girls/women/female things talk more than men DOES NOT mean that it is true.
Take a gander at this article published in a health and science magazine:


If you're too lazy to click the link and read it, I'll just tell you what it says. I have been scientifically proven that women do not talk more than men. In most cases, the amount of words spoken per day is basically same for men and women, and when there is one group speaking more, it's the men (shocker). So HAH! Take that, Society.

Of course, even with the proof and the research that these kind people have given, it's not like the stereotype is going to disappear. Firstly, the people that need the most correction aren't seeking the information. Secondly, the media portrayal of your "run-of-the-mill" woman is absolutely horrible, and not helping in any way. On every TV show, or in any book series there is that one character that is the moody, loquacious female that just goes on and on and on and on and on about stupid, girly things that no one gives a hootin’ damn about. And so all the watches are just like “UGHHHHH shut uppp” and that is how the stereotype that all women are airheaded and emotional and talkative is immortalized.

What really makes me even the more angrier is that this whole thing about us women talking too much is miraculously linked back to the other, equally stupid sterotype that women have uncontrollable emotions. We’ve discussed this before, have we not? But let’s go again because, well, rants are my thing ; )
Women are portrayed by the media to be these hyperbolic versions of characters like Jackie from THAT 70s SHOW (who we all love nevertheless). 

Air-headed, bubbly and emotional, and self-centered. According to society, we do everything too much. We talk too much, we cry too much, we complain too much. Yes, we are all Jackie Burkharts. And it all ties back to that one, stupid stereotype about how we just talk too much.
And so what if women did talk more than men? Why should an entire population of people of people be judged by something so arbitrary as the number of words they say in a day? It's not like what we are saying is less intelligent, or any less valid then what men are saying. Are words aren't just repetitions of nonsense that we babble just to hear our own, beautiful voices. Women are stereotyped as talking more because society expects men to be much quieter. 
But talking more.... Why does it matter? Such a broad stereotype as "Women Talk more than men" is just so blatantly ridiculous that I don't know how people still believe it. There are 150 million women in the U.S. alone, 3.6 billion in the whole world. That is a lot of ladies. So a generalization, so groundless, so stupid, of the 3.6 BILLION women on this earth is probably the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of (besides cheese in a can... because duh cheese in a cannnnn). There are talkative women, sure. I am one. But there are quiet women. One's who are shy. Who don't constantly share their thoughts to others. And there are talkative men. I know, it's  shocker but there are people who don't actually conform to the stereotypes (gasps and dramatic fainting from the audience)
And it's just... accepted. This completely false statement is, like, a generally accepted thing- that women talk more than men. People don't think twice when they see the characters that falsely represent women on TV. People just kinda say "whatever. Makes sense" because of this endless cycle of stereotypes surrounding women that are just forever branded into our image.
 Women are very emotional- so they talk about their feelings a lot- they talk about their feelings a lot so they must talk about other, equally airheaded things as well. This flow-chart of flawed logic is just circulating through society like the endless orbits of Jupiter's moons. 
Ugh I know, my analogies are kinda lame sometimes. But Whatever, the point remains! It's not just this one, stupid stereotype. It's a whole freakin' chain of them, wrapped around women, impossible to break free from. 
No, we're not more emotional, Society just doesn't let men show theirs. We don't talk more, and it's been proven by the magic of Science. It's just these assumptions people make, that one stereotype is true, using only the other stereotypes as basis of judgement. Do you guys get what I'm saying?
Yes? Yes. Ok? Ok. So can we just... stop making stereotypes? No. We can't do that. ok. So can we at least stop perpetuating them? When you see a lame, hyperbolized remake of our beloved Jackie on some ABC family show, don't just accept her character. Stand up off your couch and say 
"Uh-Uh. That is not a correct representation of the true demeanors and actions of women in this society!"
...Or... something along those lines. We just need to stop accepting the stereotypes that society puts so nicely in our laps, wrapped in believability and topped with sugar-coated gender-roles. So let's do it kids. I believe in us.

Goodnight, and fight those stereotypes